Sunday, October 3, 2010

I really dont get it.

The other day I was in a well known (at least in Ohio) children's consignment shop after being out and about all morning with the kiddos. It was WELL past nap time for A. I had dropped off some things for them to look at earlier in the day and was checking back to see what they took and pick up the rest. I also had to pick up several pair of pants for A since she has grown *gasp* 3 inches this past summer.

I had C in her Moby sling and A was suppose to be walking beside me. UMMMM not so much. A was done listening for the day I guess because while trying to look though the pants she kept running away from me and getting into other things. Normally my oldest is pretty well behaved in stores but like I said before *WAY* past nap time.

And then C woke up and started screaming for food. Normally I would just bust out the tata and hook her up but I couldn't do that because I was busy chasing A around the store. I'm now mad, hot, tired and cranky. I found 2 pair of pants and get in line.

"A we are almost done, just stand here with Mommy for one more minuet!"

"NO!" and goes to run away again.

"YOU NEED TO LISTEN!" and I swatted her ONE time on the bum.

Then A decided she had misbehaved and started crying and wanted me to hold her and hug her and tell her it was alright. Which I did!

You would think I beat my child since-less from the looks I got from most of the other mothers in that store (one was super nice and gave me her place next in line!) All the while C is still screaming for food.

I was telling my dad about this the next day and he brought up a great point.

In the 1980's when I was a kid (Did I just give away my age??? LOL) it was EXPECTED to parents discipline their children in public.

When did we lose that? I'm not saying beat your children. But don't let them run around misbehave in public and be disruptive. There is a HUGE difference between beating your child and spanking your child.

My daughter got her butt spanked in public. She reacted the way she always does when she gets in trouble by me. LOOKS TO ME FOR COMFORT! My daughter is NOT scared of me, she does not run from me after I spank her, SHE RUNS TOO ME!

My girls look to me for discipline and guidance. What are we telling our children if we don't provide them that? How will they know to teach THEIR children those things if they don't know them?

When M and I decided to have children we knew that we were taking responsibility for these lives. Not just to keep them alive and healthy in body. They would also need us to teach them RESPECT, KINDNESS, LIMITS, AND MORALS!

When did parents stop teaching their children these things? Why am I the abnormal one who sets limits for my child and dishes out consequences even in a public setting?

I am disgusted with parents over this! GET A GRIP PEOPLE! You are NOT going to go to jail for tapping your child once on the bumm for misbehavior in public. IN FACT, Most police officers I know (my dad was a cop I know a lot!) would shake your hand for keeping you children out of "their" system.

If you have something other then spanking that works with your child by all means use it! I most of the time (not all she gets her butt spanked at home also) use timeouts when we are home but that was not feasible at the moment.

I would never presume to tell someone how to discipline their child (unless it was a REAL beating) when out in public. What right did those mothers have to judge me because my parenting style got results!

*off soap box for the moment*

And BTW, A slept all the way home and C got fed as soon as we got to the car.


Myra Phillips said...

Good for you Katey! I for one am glad to hear that you are not afraid to discipline your children even in public. There are not enough parents like you these days. People keep asking what is wrong with kids these days and the fact of the matter is that they have no respect for anyone or anything because their parents did not discipline them and teach them respect, morals, kindness and limits. BRAVO for you for standing up and doing what your children need. You are an awesome mommy! Love you, Myra

char_char said...

I think it's awesome that you can speak your mind about this. I agree with you! Parents are so scared these days about actually disciplining their children! It drives me crazy.

kris said...

My husband and I do not spank.

But each family must decide what works for them as far as discipline. A single swat on the butt, delivered as a reasonable thought-out consequence instead of as an angry reaction to a situation? That's a parental choice.

As for disciplining my children in public?

That I have done.

On many occasions.

No way am I going to let a public setting mean that my children think the rules don't apply.

No way.

kewkew said...

I know exactly how you feel.